How to use these blogs about healing from affairs to help me
That’s where I come in.
I don’t want you to suffer. It hurts enough without adding to it.
Want an audio for more information?
https://archive.org/details/she-cheated-audio-how-to-do-feelings-after
Make sense of what happened
Let’s look at options to make sense of what happened and heal as quickly and thoroughly as possible. There are many ways to heal, and we know that you can heal, and it is also true that healing takes a little longer than any of us would like.
Again, we know how to heal, so please be patient with yourself and your pace, you will get there if you have a good process to follow. Trust that the process has worked for many people, and it could work for you. Go at your pace, but please don’t avoid feelings.
Feelings
Yes, feel the necessary pain, but not add to the pain.
This is how it will make life better for you- you will go through pain instead of avoiding it. You will lean into the pain, not add to it. As you experience that. You will upset your expectations. Pay attention and believe the words of experts, and give them attention if you want to progress faster.
Knowing what your triggers are and preparing for the ones you can predict are likely to happen. Not the ones that are possible, but the ones that are probable. Live life on life’s terms and you are likely to reduce your suffering.
Theory
I have borrowed heavily from the work in OCD because so many people are ruminating after an affair. There are many thinking traps, so let’s use the tools available to us to challenge or dispute those unhelpful thoughts.
Let’s look at strategies that have been successful for so many other people. Keep trying until you find what works for you and then master those.
Let’s be partners before parents. See this video and you will realize how we have been focusing on the kids and neglecting our relationship.
Did you know that people freely give attention to those who nurture and support them? I challenge you to nurture and support those around you in ways that are meaningful to them.
Use my blog to continue your growth
I would ask my clients to please let me know if you use my blog to continue the growth between sessions. It can be another resource for you.
Thank you for joining me today and I look forward to spending more time together in the future.
Thank you for subscribing,
Don Boice, LCSWR
“The go- to guy for conflict”
That’s where I come in.
I don’t want you to suffer. It hurts enough without adding to it.
Want an audio for more information?
https://archive.org/details/she-cheated-audio-how-to-do-feelings-after
Make sense of what happened
Let’s look at options to make sense of what happened and heal as quickly and thoroughly as possible. There are many ways to heal, and we know that you can heal, and it is also true that healing takes a little longer than any of us would like.
Again, we know how to heal, so please be patient with yourself and your pace, you will get there if you have a good process to follow. Trust that the process has worked for many people, and it could work for you. Go at your pace, but please don’t avoid feelings.
Feelings
Yes, feel the necessary pain, but not add to the pain.
This is how it will make life better for you- you will go through pain instead of avoiding it. You will lean into the pain, not add to it. As you experience that. You will upset your expectations. Pay attention and believe the words of experts, and give them attention if you want to progress faster.
Knowing what your triggers are and preparing for the ones you can predict are likely to happen. Not the ones that are possible, but the ones that are probable. Live life on life’s terms and you are likely to reduce your suffering.
Theory
I have borrowed heavily from the work in OCD because so many people are ruminating after an affair. There are many thinking traps, so let’s use the tools available to us to challenge or dispute those unhelpful thoughts.
Let’s look at strategies that have been successful for so many other people. Keep trying until you find what works for you and then master those.
Let’s be partners before parents. See this video and you will realize how we have been focusing on the kids and neglecting our relationship.
Did you know that people freely give attention to those who nurture and support them? I challenge you to nurture and support those around you in ways that are meaningful to them.
Use my blog to continue your growth
I would ask my clients to please let me know if you use my blog to continue the growth between sessions. It can be another resource for you.
Thank you for joining me today and I look forward to spending more time together in the future.
Thank you for subscribing,
Don Boice, LCSWR
“The go- to guy for conflict”
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