How well do I sacrifice my needs and put others first?
Let’s talk conflict
Not throwing myself under the bus, though. Some people struggle to let others be first from time to time or at all.
Think about the level of conflict with that person. There are some opportunities for growth for that person and also for the person in relationship with them. Confronting people is difficult. The mindset is important when confronting.
When you are relating, let them know how their behavior affects you. You are relating to their words and actions.
“When you make it about you, I think you do not care about me. I then question the long-term viability of the relationship.”
“I sometimes think my feelings and preferences don’t matter to you. The story I tell myself is that you see the value of what you want and not what I want. I pull back a bit when I think about that. Do my feelings matter to you?”
“I would trust you more if you could put me first sometimes. I put you first a lot and I don’t really feel like you reciprocate. Can I rely on you to sacrifice for me when it is important?”
Let’s talk conflict
Not throwing myself under the bus, though. Some people struggle to let others be first from time to time or at all.
Think about the level of conflict with that person. There are some opportunities for growth for that person and also for the person in relationship with them. Confronting people is difficult. The mindset is important when confronting.
When you are relating, let them know how their behavior affects you. You are relating to their words and actions.
“When you make it about you, I think you do not care about me. I then question the long-term viability of the relationship.”
“I sometimes think my feelings and preferences don’t matter to you. The story I tell myself is that you see the value of what you want and not what I want. I pull back a bit when I think about that. Do my feelings matter to you?”
“I would trust you more if you could put me first sometimes. I put you first a lot and I don’t really feel like you reciprocate. Can I rely on you to sacrifice for me when it is important?”
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