​Stacking practices for flow
 
What combinations get the best results?
 
You want to have perseverance and grit, when can you best train for those? Make it hard on yourself, train under harder than usual conditions and then when the time comes to perform, it feels easy. That has been done by coaches for many years. Seems that the same idea is used for Flow.
 
How?
First, choose a weakness to work on. Put it at the end of the day, so you are already tired. Exhaust yourself before you start addressing the weakness.
 
 
Or
Use a few of your active recovery periods overlapping- the sauna and bath, to practice mindfulness. Combine your workouts and get more benefit, but make certain you are doing them well.
 
Try to make books your primary information source- when you’re loading the pattern recognition system, you can’t match the data density with any other material.
 
Use “the MacGyver method” before you enter your release/mindfulness practice. That way the practice does double-duty.
 
While you’re still working way through passion, play at the intersection of curiosity as a time to load up pattern recognition with the information it needs to find connections between ideas.
 
Always layer flow triggers into every activity. Make novelty, complexity, and unpredictability your good friends. Make sure that items on your clear goals list sit in that challenge-skills sweet spot. Find a Feedback buddy. Practice taking safe risks and repeat.

​Be strategic with flow
 
If you want to increase the likelihood of getting into flow repeatedly, try this routine:
Every day, spend a chunk of time uninterrupted, accomplishing the tasks that are hardest. Start smaller but work up to 90-120 minutes a day of uninterrupted time. Make sure you get feedback on this from a trusted mentor or advisor.
 
Each week spend a chunk of time, up to 6 hours, doing that which puts you in flow. Play, enjoy and get into your zone regularly. Build the muscles, emotional and mental, that put you into flow.
 
Imagine practicing focusing, especially when you are exhausted from a long day. You are rehearsing for life. You will get distracted and you will bounce back. They call this practice, “Distraction Management.”
 
Imagine at least a few times a week getting 60 minutes or more of true exercise, beyond that which makes you feel comfortable. Train your nervous system to not give up when you feel discomfort. Stop if you’ll cause injury but push through discomfort.
 
Rest and recuperation are vital- massage, yoga, sauna, mindfulness a few times weekly for a minimum of 20 minutes and you will love how quickly your body bounces back.
 
Weakness training- be the best you can be at one of your worst. Minimum of 30 minutes a week.
 
 
30 to 60 minutes, one time a week get feedback on the work you’ve been doing during the 90 to 120 minute periods of uninterrupted concentration
 
Social supports that’s two hours a week make time for other people, especially if you’re an introvert. It helps keep us calm and happy and psychologically prepared to attack the challenge- skills sweet spot.
 
It gives us a place to practice our emotional intelligence skills.
Please attribute these ideas to Steven Kotler- Author of Superman and the Art of Impossible. I have made minor changes, but the ideas come from him and the work of Czitenmihalyi, author of Flow. 

​Be curious about life. How does that work? How do I do this? Is this the only way to do that? Could I do it differently and get a better result? Ooh, when I did it differently, I liked it better. I like how that feels. Now add a purpose. Doesn’t have to be earth shattering…
 
Skateboarders do that. They see something on TV or YouTube etc and they try to mimic it. They find a different way to do it. Same for other sports, basketball moves, soccer feints etc…
 
Ive seen kids practice for hours trying to get better (mastery and purpose). They love doing it and then wonder what else they are capable of doing (curiosity). Their passion is obvious as they spend free time doing this. They love the hard work, the challenge that comes with it. They appreciate the flow, getting in the zone and focusing on the present moment.
 
Imagine that person doing music or other sports or learning a subject in school that tangentially relates to their curiosity. They see how it dovetails. If this is possible, then what if I could do…. They might take a break from the physicality of it and let their brains loose. They are spending their own time, self-directed doing what they enjoy (autonomy mixed in with passion) and learning how things work (mastery).
 
Imagine this applied to a career goal or something that makes the world a better place. I would like to help end homelessness. With that big purpose in mind, what smaller parts would I need to address? Lets look at what steps you need to get there. Keep breaking them down and then the goal or purpose becomes more doable.
 
Start doing what is on the list, every day and watch how you get closer and closer to the goal. Every day you get closer and are applying passion, mastery, curiosity and autonomy. You enter flow and your brain works even better, while you are enjoying feeling good and the life satisfaction of pursuing your purpose.
 
Each day brings you closer to your goal and you can feel the momentum shift. What is one activity I could do today that would make a difference? What if I could do several every single day and it would get me even closer, but faster?
 
All these concepts are borrowed from Steven Kotler- Superman and the Art of Impossible, who is applying the flow research of czitenmihalyi.  

​Want to get in flow?
Keep challenging yourself, pushing yourself a little bit more and taking healthy risks. Push your comfort zone until you are so comfortable being uncomfortable, that your comfort zone has greatly expanded.
 
Encourage people to choose their direction and use mastery concepts to get there. What do you want to master? How quickly are you willing to master that? What would it take to hold yourself to account in mastering it as quickly as possible? Now demonstrate mastery, with an audience and hold yourself to that standard. We do that naturally, when we play. Ironic, isn’t it? How about this? The chemical cocktail that rewards the brain is amazing and increases life satisfaction. Play more,  go into flow by pursuing mastery and taking risks and you will have a life that is highly rewarding emotionally and satisfying. Want to be the best version of you? Play more. No one needs motivation to play.
 
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Can you picture yourself doing that? What is the most outlandish thing you can picture yourself doing? Someone has already done that, most likely. Increase it a little bit. Everyone in sports psychology gets the relationship between visualizing it and being able to do it. You greatly increase your odds of doing it in reality, if you have previously pictured it, even if it was previously thought to be impossible.
 
We all learn new patterns at our own pace and we can improve the pace of learning by visualizing. It increases the ease of the process and a smoother transition.
 
It does not matter if no one has done it before, mental rehearsal helps manage anxiety and fear. The frontal lobe is less engaged and fear has less ability to take hold. You can picture the perfect form or the best result and you are programming your mind, which extends to your physiology. Or you can work really hard, set goals, overcome each fear individually and have incremental progress…
 
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Managing fear
Kids are less fearful for a host of reasons. Their brains have not fully formed the frontal lobe and that helps. They don’t know what is “impossible” and so will try those things that adults don’t even attempt. As they slip into flow, the pre-frontal cortex starts to shut down, and they are more prone to flow. One study talkeda bout them hovering on the edge of flow much of the time. Put a kid who is hovering on the edge into flow and it is an easier process to get into flow repeatedly. No one needs to externally validate them or tell them to practice it because it is such a wonderful experience. Autonomy, mastery and purpose made conscious…
 
Steven Kotler- Superman and the Art of Impossible 

How do we get into flow and stay there?
Sleep enough. Most people do not get 8 hours, even with naps. Feeling rested is important and getting yourself in the delta wavelength of sleep is helpful for flow.

One of the suggestions was to take some time and make goals every single day, at the end of your work day. Prepare for tomorrow, so that you don't lose your place. One method is to use your early energy to do the hardest, and least rewarding task. That way, when it is done, it is all good from there. If you cannot finish your list today, do it tomorrow.

Gratitude practice every day is recommended for getting yourself into flow. Do at least a few minutes. Not sure what to be thankful for? Start saying "Thank you," over and over and watch how things come to mind.

Imagine waking up and doing 20 minutes of mindfulness. Being in the moment and setting up that pattern for success today...

Read a book outside your niche, outside your area of mastery. 25 minutes a day is the recommendation. Your brain makes connections all the time. Give it raw information from a book that is related to your field and watch your brain start to connect the dots.
 
For today, we will end with suggesting that you do something that really excites you, every week. What already gets you in flow and push yourself to have fun and passion, push it by challenging yourself. Not too easy, not too hard as you seek out novelty, complexity and  unpredictability.

A client of mine told me he binge watched John Wayne movies while he had covid. He understands that John Wayne is a fictional character. He realizes that John Wayne was invented to create a narrative about the “ideal man” who would be easier to exploit by business. He appears strong and independent and the business world wants people independent, because when people band together, it is harder to exploit them.

What does this have to do with marriage?

If the man in the  marriage grew up on John Wayne, he behaves a certain way. He idealizes independence. When his wife expects interdependence instead, he thinks she is devaluing men. He doesn’t realize that he was fed the John Wayne fictional character and that he bought it without thinking it through. He did not come up with that himself. It is not real and it is not healthy in a relationship. It definitely appeals to a certain swath of men, though.
It appeals to the person who wants to be independent and not share his power. Always in control (as if that is possible in reality) and rarely shows emotion (talk to women about emotional connection).

So, TV is often about creating reality. They created “the ideal man” who really is a stunted human and they offered him as a role model for how men should be. Then they wonder why men don’t continue growing. They think they have achieved the pinnacle of what it means to be a healthy man and see no reason to keep growing. Kinda pathetic what we do to each other in this society. Don’t get me started on Disney Princesses and what that teaches girls and young women about waiting for a prince to rescue them!

​Some people can see beyond the fictional character but some people just are not able to think it all the way through to the logical conclusion.

​Athletes and scholars could benefit from mental toughness.

If you want to skip the reading and go right into the exercises, someone took the effort and time to read the books, record the imagination exercises for free...

You might like this site- good sports psychology stuff for high school aged athletes- for free.
https://archive.org/details/@mental_toughness_guy

I just finished uploading a series of audios to www.archive.org  Search "Don Boice"

Highly recommend this one if you need a quick booster:
 https://archive.org/details/must-you-respond-poorly-to-bad-behavior-bad-communication-in-a-relationship


If you only have a few minutes, though, https://archive.org/details/empathy-meditation-and-how-to-do-feelings-for-couples

If you know someone who would benefit from listening, please feel free to share.
https://archive.org/details/empathy-compassion-forgiveness-gratitude-and-criticism-for-couples

https://archive.org/details/dfficult-emotions-gratitude-im-right-youre-wrong-you-do-it-too-taking-responsibility

https://archive.org/details/interrupting-hard-to-listen-talker-good-listening-couples

https://archive.org/details/prepare-for-the-negative-and-the-argument-so-that-you-are-ready-emotionally-cont

https://archive.org/details/communication-traps-direct-and-indirect-couples