After chores, sex and money, this is one of the biggest issues in couples counseling in my office:
Does one of you watch TV more than the other person does? On their phone more…
Is one person or an early bird or a night owl?
How do you accommodate the other person?
Is one of you more physically active in general?
Does one of you have more energy than the other person?
Differences are not the problem. Differences make for opportunities to learn something new about oneself and their partner. You can expand your repertoire by having differences. Thinking the differences are bad is the problem. Thinking that the difference is pathological or wrong, because their style is different- that contempt is the problem.
Does one of you watch TV more than the other person does? On their phone more…
Is one person or an early bird or a night owl?
How do you accommodate the other person?
Is one of you more physically active in general?
Does one of you have more energy than the other person?
Differences are not the problem. Differences make for opportunities to learn something new about oneself and their partner. You can expand your repertoire by having differences. Thinking the differences are bad is the problem. Thinking that the difference is pathological or wrong, because their style is different- that contempt is the problem.
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