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Playing the Mind Reading Game

10/21/2015

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Let’s play the mind reading game where you guess what I am thinking. No volunteers, let’s have spouses do it.

Mind read and tell me how successful it was for you.

Yet, you are telling her exactly why she did what she did.

You are filling in the whole story as if you really knew what the other person was doing and why, without the humility that is required. Humility is required when mind reading. We ask you to be a bit more tentative and ask them if that was what they were thinking. For example, "Hey, your last text to me was kinda short and I was not sure if you were really busy or if you might be mad at me. Are you mad at me?"

Your mind reading may be accurate in about 30% of the cases, which means about 70% of the time it is wrong. Stop mind reading. Ask the person rather than making assumptions or jumping to conclusions.
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    Don Boice
    Don Boice, LCSW-R, specializes in gender communication with couples in conflict.  

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