We Need to Communicate Better as a Couple
Deep listening and loving speech As Adapted from Thich Nhat Hanh by Don Boice
Imagine vowing this to your partner, “Aware of the suffering caused by the inability to listen to others and on mindful speech, I vow to cultivate deep listening and loving speech to bring joy and happiness to others and relieve others of their suffering.
Knowing that words can create happiness or suffering, I vow to learn to speak truthfully with words that inspire self-confidence, joy, and hope. I am determined not to spread news that I do not know to be certain, and not to criticize or condemn things of which I am not sure.
I will refrain from words that can cause division or discord, for they can cause the family or community to break.
I will make all efforts to reconcile and resolve all conflicts, however small.”
When you recall these qualities of great compassion and understanding, you acknowledge their presence within you, and you will immediately suffer less.
When you are suffering, you forget your true nature, your goodness, and believe that within you is only suffering, only fear, turmoil, and hatred. Please, remember to trust in your true and good nature.
Can you remind your friends, telling them, “Look deeply into the situation. If you allow yourself to be dominated by negative emotions, you will react in ways that cause more suffering. You will want to punish the other person and say unkind things. We’ve all done this many, many times. To break out of this habit of suffering, this trap, we must remember to practice mindfulness, to touch our True nature.
Being aware of our jealousy, judgments, and fear is already a positive step toward acceptance. When we accept ourselves as we are, we’re not any longer needing to fight to change ourselves.”
For good measure, you can add this - “The moment we become aware that we are being too critical of ourselves, and we accept our negative seeds, we are already making progress. People who are unaware of their negative energies will have difficulty making progress.”
Deep listening and loving speech As Adapted from Thich Nhat Hanh by Don Boice
Imagine vowing this to your partner, “Aware of the suffering caused by the inability to listen to others and on mindful speech, I vow to cultivate deep listening and loving speech to bring joy and happiness to others and relieve others of their suffering.
Knowing that words can create happiness or suffering, I vow to learn to speak truthfully with words that inspire self-confidence, joy, and hope. I am determined not to spread news that I do not know to be certain, and not to criticize or condemn things of which I am not sure.
I will refrain from words that can cause division or discord, for they can cause the family or community to break.
I will make all efforts to reconcile and resolve all conflicts, however small.”
When you recall these qualities of great compassion and understanding, you acknowledge their presence within you, and you will immediately suffer less.
When you are suffering, you forget your true nature, your goodness, and believe that within you is only suffering, only fear, turmoil, and hatred. Please, remember to trust in your true and good nature.
Can you remind your friends, telling them, “Look deeply into the situation. If you allow yourself to be dominated by negative emotions, you will react in ways that cause more suffering. You will want to punish the other person and say unkind things. We’ve all done this many, many times. To break out of this habit of suffering, this trap, we must remember to practice mindfulness, to touch our True nature.
Being aware of our jealousy, judgments, and fear is already a positive step toward acceptance. When we accept ourselves as we are, we’re not any longer needing to fight to change ourselves.”
For good measure, you can add this - “The moment we become aware that we are being too critical of ourselves, and we accept our negative seeds, we are already making progress. People who are unaware of their negative energies will have difficulty making progress.”
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