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Why Would He Push Her Away?

1/8/2021

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​“I intimidate people,” she said as she walked into my office.
Yep, I could see why immediately from her looks to her vocabulary to her absolute intensity and perfectionism. Anyone of that status would intimidate.
 
We tend to compare ourselves to our partners and no one wants to be on the side of “I’m more into them than they are into me.” No one.
 
We wonder if we measure up and fear that we do not. That’s a universal, until you have done the work.
 
Insightful, kind considerate, encouraging, very open, good parent, positive, likes touch and loves to be sexual… yep, those are desirable traits that most men are looking for. Unless, she is better than you…
 
She reassures, forgives, has good friends, loves animals and comes from a good family. She takes good risks and goes for her goals in life.
 
Why would a guy push her away? Anyone? Anyone?
 
How about this?
“She’s too good for me. I am going to get dumped when she sees the real me. Some other guy is going to hit on her and I won’t last. If she is going to leave me anyway, I might as well do it on my terms.”
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    Don Boice
    Don Boice, LCSW-R, specializes in gender communication with couples in conflict.  

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